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Hideoscillous: ie. Hideous Oscillations
from the Latin root hideous to the eye, yet one possessing beautiful oscillating motions in the water.
An extreme combination of modern hull contours produces the glide of ‘free-friction’ between turns which intersects with the hold of a back foot ‘clamp’. A pedal-to-the-metal bear down of ultimate gougeability through maneuvers.
The old adage ‘looks can be deceiving’ & ‘true beauty lies within’ are the driving forces of this compact possessor of an unassuming depth of character.
This one – the Hideoscillous, transforms small surf like no other board I’ve made ’til now – it feels like the board rides on air – no friction – yet holds & corners on rails while balancing controlled lip release.
It’s like a healthy marriage between free friction & ultimate gouge-ability.
I may go so far as to say that this new rocker & steep concave bottom can be placed on any outline & foil to increase the horsepower.
The ugly duckling that transforms into a swan when you step foot on it.
I have been pondering a new paradigm for rockers & hull contours for over three years now. The days pass & I’ve continued to grind out & refine existing concepts … all the while knowing something new was coming. A groaning of enlightened concept awaiting a bursting forth.
Why did I wait this long?
Well, things must germinate … and I didn’t think I could draw in CAD what my mind saw … I would need to hand shape the prototype.
A new balanced/centered rocker, moderate entry, low tail rocker, with heavy heavy tow board-like concaves running nose-to-tail & dynamic steep drop rocker concave running dual inset bonzer-esque caves which exhaust straight off the tail block.
The outline, width & thickness determine the wave type.
A beach-break friendly shortboard for the smallest, most gutless days. Like surfing your shortboard so your transition back to decent waves is more seamless. Turns the “small wave boo-hoo’s into the small wave woo-hoo’s”
| Popular Dimensions | Volume | Rider Weight |
| 5’2″ x 19 1/2″ x 2 1/8″ | 24.5L | Rider weight: 120-140 lb / 54-63 kg |
| 5’4″ x 19 3/4″ x 2 5/16″ | 26.5L | Rider weight: 85-160 lb / 38-72 kg |
| 5’5″ x 19 1/4″ x 2 3/16″ | 25.7L | Rider weight: 75-155 lb / 34-70 kg |
| 5’5” x 19 3/4” x 2 5/16” | 28.5L | Rider weight: 85-180 lb / 38-81 kg |
| 5’6″ x 19 7/8″ x 2 5/16″ | 28.7L | Rider weight: 85-180 lb / 38-81 kg |
| 5’7″ x 20″ x 2 7/16″ Peter | 31L | Rider weight: 140-185 lb / 63-83 kg |
| 5’8″ x 20″ x 2 1/2″ | 31L | Rider weight: 140-185 lb / 63-84 kg |
| 5’8″ x 20 1/4″ x 2 1/2″ | 32.9L | Rider weight: 160-195 lb / 72-88 kg |
| 5’9” x 20” x 2 7/16” | 31.5L | Rider weight: 140-185 lb / 63-83 kg |
| 5’10” x 20 1/4″ x 2 1/2″ | 33.4L | Rider weight: 175-195 lb / 79-88 kg |
| 5’10” x 20 1/4″ x 2 9/16″ | 34L | Rider weight: 175-205 lb / 79-93 kg |
| 6’0″ x 20 3/4″ x 2 9/16″ | 35.5L | Rider weight: 175-220 lb / 79-100 kg |
| 6’0″ x 20 1/2″ x 2 3/4″ | 37.6L | Rider weight: 175-220 lb / 79-100 kg |
| 6’2″ x 20 1/2″ x 2 7/8″ | 42.7L | Rider weight: 200-250 lb / 90-113 kg |
| 6’2” x 21 3/4” x 2 5/8” | 39.2L | Rider weight: 190-230 lb / 86-104 kg |
| 6’2″ x 21 3/4″ x 3″ | 46L | Rider weight: 190-250 lb / 86-113 kg |
| 6’4″ x 21″ x 2 3/4″ | 40.5L | Rider weight: 200-240 lb / 90-109 kg |
| 6’4″ x 22″ x 2 3/4″ | 45L | Rider weight: 190-250 lb / 86-113 kg |
| 6’4″ x 22 1/2″ x 3″ | 49L | Rider weight: 190-260 lb / 86-117 kg |
| 6’6” x 23” x 3 1/4” | 56L | Rider weight: 200-260 lb / 90-117 kg |
| 6’6″ x 24″ x 3 5/8″ | 63.6L | Rider weight: 200-295 lb / 90-133 kg |
Ride approximately 6″ – 7″ shorter, 1 1/4″ wider & 1/8″ thicker than your good waves performance shorty.
construction options & pricing
a word from the shaper:
The ugly duckling that transforms into a swan when you step foot on it. A small wave board where ‘free-friction’ meets ‘ultimate gougeability’ in a marriage of perfectly complementing design concepts.
The carbon/ kevlar stringerless epoxy construction makes this a very lively summertime, average waves section-making, buckets to the roof machine.
how to get your board
ordering options
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Today's storyboard:
On the left we have a 5'8" x 20" x 2 9/16" #HideoJet; #Hideoscillous rocker, outline and rails with the hydrofoilized hull of the Jetstream. The first of its kind with many to follow. The brainchild of which was birthed for my friend @rickyschaffer – A fast and furious little wide flatty for lackluster days that has proven itself in not just the weak stuff, but in a variety of bigger and even bowly stuff too. Ricky couldn't get off it, saying, "The worse the waves are, the better it rides"…AND…"The better the waves get, the better it rides." Personally I don't like to argue over statements like that, so we decided to whip up another derivative i.e. the shape on the right…which is 5'10" x 19 7/8" x 2 9/16" slightly more rail line and slightly less width and the same jetstream hull… to fit nicely in the range right between the Hiddy and #MonstaJet. Let you know what it does when it hits the water. Not sure yet what to call it…possibly 'The Silly Goose'??…any ideas…?? #jetstreamsurfboard photo: Duncan McKenzie
Super custom for Michael, Oahu #southshore speedster – #pavote with abscess tooth rocker, deep #hideoscillous caves & a single wing #moontail for hair twitch trigger response … Oh, and there's four parabolic #channels that end before the tail (in place of bonner caves) #americansurfboardfactory #toddgettindirty
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