HIDEOSCILLOUS / HIDEOJET

hideous to the eye, yet possessing beautiful oscillating motions in the water.

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Ricky Schaffer 49/6'0"/180lb on a 5'8" x 20"  2 9/16" 32L HideoJet. photo: Duncan McKenzie

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HideoJet trenches

The Hideoscillous - rides on air – no friction – yet corners on rails
The Hideoscillous – rides on air – no friction – yet corners on rails
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Hideoscillous 3D
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With 3/4 chimes up front and I set with sluicebox channels scalloped and trenched out from just ahead of the front foot through to off the tail. #waterfallingconcaves For extreme lift, drive, grip and glide to transform head high and under pointbreak surfing.

The Hidescillous Surfboard
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HideoJet trenches & chimes

Forever Grom post-Hideoscillous
Ricky Schaffer, tell us about the Hideoscillous
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The Hideoscillous - rides on air – no friction – yet corners on rails
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The Hidescillous Surfboard
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Forever Grom post-Hideoscillous
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Hideoscillous: ie. Hideous Oscillations

from the Latin root hideous to the eye, yet one possessing beautiful oscillating motions in the water.

An extreme combination of modern hull contours produces the glide of ‘free-friction’ between turns which intersects with the hold of a back foot ‘clamp’. A pedal-to-the-metal bear down of ultimate gougeability through maneuvers. 

The old adage ‘looks can be deceiving’ & ‘true beauty lies within’ are the driving forces of this compact possessor of an unassuming depth of character.

This one – the Hideoscillous, transforms small surf like no other board I’ve made ’til now – it feels like the board rides on air – no friction – yet holds & corners on rails while balancing controlled lip release.

It’s like a healthy marriage between free friction & ultimate gouge-ability.

I may go so far as to say that this new rocker & steep concave bottom can be placed on any outline & foil to increase the horsepower.

The ugly duckling that transforms into a swan when you step foot on it.

I have been pondering a new paradigm for rockers & hull contours for over three years now. The days pass & I’ve continued to grind out & refine existing concepts … all the while knowing something new was coming. A groaning of enlightened concept awaiting a bursting forth.

Why did I wait this long?hideoscillous-3d

Well, things must germinate … and I didn’t think I could draw in CAD what my mind saw … I would need to hand shape the prototype.

A new balanced/centered rocker, moderate entry, low tail rocker, with heavy heavy tow board-like concaves running nose-to-tail & dynamic steep drop rocker concave running dual inset bonzer-esque caves which exhaust straight off the tail block.

The outline, width & thickness determine the wave type.

A beach-break friendly shortboard for the smallest, most gutless days. Like surfing your shortboard so your transition back to decent waves is more seamless. Turns the “small wave boo-hoo’s into the small wave woo-hoo’s”

Todd’s picks for traction, fins, & other board essentials

Power Broker

Wideload Dakine Traction

Popular DimensionsVolumeRider Weight
5’2″ x 19 1/2″ x 2 1/8″24.5LRider weight: 120-140 lb / 54-63 kg
5’4″ x 19 3/4″ x 2 5/16″26.5LRider weight: 85-160 lb / 38-72 kg
5’5″ x 19 1/4″ x 2 3/16″25.7LRider weight: 75-155 lb / 34-70 kg
5’5” x 19 3/4” x 2 5/16” 28.5LRider weight: 85-180 lb / 38-81 kg
5’6″ x 19 7/8″ x 2 5/16″28.7LRider weight: 85-180 lb / 38-81 kg
5’7″ x 20″ x 2 7/16″ Peter31LRider weight: 140-185 lb / 63-83 kg
5’8″ x 20″ x 2 1/2″31LRider weight: 140-185 lb / 63-84 kg
5’8″ x 20 1/4″ x 2 1/2″32.9LRider weight: 160-195 lb / 72-88 kg
5’9” x 20” x 2 7/16”31.5LRider weight: 140-185 lb / 63-83 kg
5’10” x 20 1/4″ x 2 1/2″ 33.4LRider weight: 175-195 lb / 79-88 kg
5’10” x 20 1/4″ x 2 9/16″ 34LRider weight: 175-205 lb / 79-93 kg
6’0″ x 20 3/4″ x 2 9/16″35.5LRider weight: 175-220 lb / 79-100 kg
6’0″ x 20 1/2″ x 2 3/4″37.6LRider weight: 175-220 lb / 79-100 kg
6’2″ x 20 1/2″ x 2 7/8″42.7LRider weight: 200-250 lb / 90-113 kg
6’2” x 21 3/4” x 2 5/8”39.2LRider weight: 190-230 lb / 86-104 kg
6’2″ x 21 3/4″ x 3″ 46LRider weight: 190-250 lb / 86-113 kg
6’4″ x 21″ x 2 3/4″40.5LRider weight: 200-240 lb / 90-109 kg
6’4″ x 22″ x 2 3/4″45LRider weight: 190-250 lb / 86-113 kg
6’4″ x 22 1/2″ x 3″49LRider weight: 190-260 lb / 86-117 kg
6’6” x 23” x 3 1/4” 56LRider weight: 200-260 lb / 90-117 kg
6’6″ x 24″ x 3 5/8″63.6LRider weight: 200-295 lb / 90-133 kg

Ride approximately 6″ – 7″ shorter, 1 1/4″ wider & 1/8″ thicker than your good waves performance shorty.

construction options & pricing

Polyester/Polyurethane

$725+
traditional foam & fiberglass - starting at ...

Proxy epoxy/EPS

$875+
3-5 x the strength & durability of a poly, lighterweight & slightly more buoyant

Carbon Footprint

$1025+
stringerless Proxy epoxy with carbon reinforced rails

Titanium II Series

$1025+
any of our Proxy epoxy iterations with the additiona of strategically placed carbon/kevlar mesh

a word from the shaper:

The ugly duckling that transforms into a swan when you step foot on it. A small wave board where ‘free-friction’ meets ‘ultimate gougeability’ in a marriage of perfectly complementing design concepts.

as demonstrated by Pete Mendia
The carbon/ kevlar stringerless epoxy construction makes this a very lively summertime, average waves section-making, buckets to the roof machine.
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how to get your board

ordering options

Ready to Ship >> from Stock

Custom Order & Detail your Board directly with Todd >>

Order Stock Quick >> 2 week build

Customize your Board >> in the Online Shop

Stoked surfer reports >> this just in: “Yo Proccy I just rode that original 5’10” x 19 3/4” x 2 5/8” 33L #Falcon2surfboard with the double wing swallowtail, the super lite poly one…and it goes so nuclear!! I need to get a duplicate of that same board in the works. I need to always have a fresh one of these in the quiver.” - Ricky from Oceanside 
age: 54, height: 5’11 1/2” weight: 185lbs. 
@raymondjoycephotography

Stoked surfer reports >> this just in: “Yo Proccy I just rode that original 5’10” x 19 3/4” x 2 5/8” 33L #Falcon2surfboard with the double wing swallowtail, the super lite poly one…and it goes so nuclear!! I need to get a duplicate of that same board in the works. I need to always have a fresh one of these in the quiver.” – Ricky from Oceanside
age: 54, height: 5’11 1/2” weight: 185lbs.
@raymondjoycephotography

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Surfing like this hearkens back to a more civilized time
…when Jedi’s wielded elegant weapons made of light. One of San Clemente’s peaceful warriors @jonahcarter_ engaging the flow that ties the universe together. 
5’8” x 18 1/2” x 2 5/16” 25L #Falcon3surfboard

Surfing like this hearkens back to a more civilized time
…when Jedi’s wielded elegant weapons made of light. One of San Clemente’s peaceful warriors @jonahcarter_ engaging the flow that ties the universe together.
5’8” x 18 1/2” x 2 5/16” 25L #Falcon3surfboard

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Happy Thanksgiving everyone! We love you.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! We love you.

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There’s a few new sheriff’s in town to get the word out on our latest board breakdowns, ripper clips, board art, some philosophical rants and tirades, as well as general joyous happenings at our mom and pop made in the free world, custom surfboard factory. So come on and check us out also on (1) THE BLOG (it’s back and large and in charge) straight off the site and blazing all kine’s hype and propaganda (i.e. truthful goodness) straight offa proctorsurf.com (2) VERO - kinda like insta but with diffy treats and goodies to tantalize the most outspoken punk rock ‘tudes (3) MeWe - Sorta Facey but way more spacey for the kinda universe where everybody feels at home and there’s no peeping tom’s making you feel like ur being watched when you don’t wanna be. All board’s all the time, and where the shaper can truly be hisself. Visit the various spots and see what suits your fancy best cuz I’ll be updating weekly.

There’s a few new sheriff’s in town to get the word out on our latest board breakdowns, ripper clips, board art, some philosophical rants and tirades, as well as general joyous happenings at our mom and pop made in the free world, custom surfboard factory. So come on and check us out also on (1) THE BLOG (it’s back and large and in charge) straight off the site and blazing all kine’s hype and propaganda (i.e. truthful goodness) straight offa proctorsurf.com (2) VERO – kinda like insta but with diffy treats and goodies to tantalize the most outspoken punk rock ‘tudes (3) MeWe – Sorta Facey but way more spacey for the kinda universe where everybody feels at home and there’s no peeping tom’s making you feel like ur being watched when you don’t wanna be. All board’s all the time, and where the shaper can truly be hisself. Visit the various spots and see what suits your fancy best cuz I’ll be updating weekly.

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